How I feel...

Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Marty McFlying Out!!!
Delorean Style!

Thanks for the Memories...

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My second to last goodbye to her...
Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Marty McFlying Out!!!
Delorean Style!

Time

I got some advice from one of the homies. She told me to just give her
some time. Whenever she does call, if she does, it'll be the perfect
time.
Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Marty McFlying Out!!!
In Sidekick Mode!

Now they Say that the Good Guys Always Win the Girl

I'll let you know if that statement is really true.

Now I know you've rejected me so many times on this issue but I guess I
just enjoy being turned down by you. I was thinking about that chillin'
during college thing and I doubt that's really gonna work. If we shall
be together, we shall be together. If not, then... The grey areas make
now sense. I wanna be able think about you as mine not almost mine or
half way mine. That's whack. I don't know what went on during the
weekend but I was kinda hurt when you said you got my messages and you
didn't reply. I felt like a loser. I understand that you feel that
you've been hurt too many times. I'm giving you that chance to not be
hurt anymore. I'm not saying I'll be perfect. I'm just saying that I
love you so much that I could take risking all the "fun" that I'm
suppose to have in college just to know that when I come back home we
could kick it. Kick it hard! Remember when we used to kick it hard? One
day I just started laughing. Just out of the blue. My mom looked at me
funny and said you just had the biggest smile on your face. I was
thinking about when we used to chill. I wish you were there so we could
make it an inside joke and she would think we were crazy together...lol.
Speaking of that, I had a dream that we were at this pool party and we
completely fell in love again. I guess when I'm awake I can control not
thinking about you (lie). But I dream about you all the time. I don't
know, I've got a new insight on how I feel and I wanna be with you
forever. I don't wanna beat around the bush anymore. I miss you so much
and I just can't seem to let it go. Tell me if you feel the same. Just
say something, that's all I want and this time maybe I will accept your
rejection. You're my everything and its stupid to go around and act like
I'm feeling these girls still knowing the truth that, when I look at
them, I see you. I feel like its necessary to talk everyday 'cause I
could lose you but I don't think I would stress it anymore if its either
this or the other. No in-betweens. Please let me know, for real. All I
want to do is be with Danielle Ludlow not these other lame ass girls.
Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Marty McFlying Out!!!
Delorean Style!

Best I Ever Had!!!

This video is great! Kanye is a genius! Drake is a genius for the song. This was halarious!!!lol
Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Marty McFlying Out!!!
Delorean Style!

Houstatlantavegas

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Once again, I've connected the music I listen to, to life. Only one person has noticed I do that. I can take any song and remix it to fit exactly what's going on the moment...lol. Today I connected with Drizzy (pause). After 2:57 on the YouTube player, I thought of somebody. Somebody moderately important. She kinda lost it when she played me. That wasn't cool. I mean, I don't know what was going on, on her side of the world but it felt like she played me.

Nah, but yeah...This hit me when I was listening to this song. Just wanted to share it with you all. (If anyone actually cares...lol.) I get no play on this blog. I may just stop doing it.
Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Marty McFlying Out!!!
Delorean Style!

My Heaven at Night

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I was listening to the song above and realizing that the starting lyrics until "focused on floating, your focus is tight" are extremely true. When I got shot on April 18, 2009 around 2 am at a party, I literally saw the "light." Like, literally.

By the way: (As I write, I drink the best lemonade in the world from Chef Luciano's)

First of all, if you didn't know, as I was running out of a party where some people were shooting, there was this dude running and he pulled out a Revolver (who still has Revolvers? apparently him) and he fired two times. As I was making a motion to duck the shots, I noticed that my right leg left from under me. It just stopped holding me up and went numb. Then I suddenly felt the right side of my face go numb and thought I was hit there too. When I fell to the ground, my friend Mac told to hop to him and get out of the middle of the street. I hopped to homie and then that's when I was leaving for Heaven.... at night.

I got really sleepy and tired. All these people came from all directions and they began to ruin my sleep. All I wanted to do was rest my eyes for a few minutes until the paramedics came.

This girl, which was pretty decent, came and put my head on her lap and she began to fan me. She was creaming at me, telling me to stay awake. Then it was this dude named "Ice-G" that kept repeating his name to me so that my mind would keep operating.

Every time I would close my eyes, I saw a beam of white light surrounded by darkness. I felt like I was walking closer and closer and the light grew bigger. When I would open my eyes the light fade and I would see the people surrounding me. When I closed them again, the light started from the same place and it kept getting bigger and brighter. I kinda blacked out after the paramedics came and all I can remember vividly was seeing my mother and grandma as I was rushed to the OR then I blacked out again and slept for 24 hours after a 6 hour surgery.
Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Marty McFlying Out!!!
Delorean Style!

IDK

I really don't know what to say. I don't know if I'm taking it too far
again or if I'm right. This is very confusing. I've been hitting her up
but she hasn't been hittin' me back. Last time we talked we ended a good
note. We were all mushy and stuff but I don't know what's happened since
then. I'm so lost! I was worried about her but now that I know she's
okay, I started to feel extra stupid. I've been sending her a text a day
since Friday and I've received nothing. Is there something wrong. Even
if there is, she usually hits me back so this is why I'm so confused. I
miss her a lot. Maybe this is her way of telling me to leave her alone.
I'm not going to send her a messaging snapping or anything 'cause then
there would've been nothing wrong and then she would hate me again. I
just have bad luck with her. I just can't do anything right. Even with
all the "I love you's." Even if when I tell her she's the most amazing
girl in the world I love her more than I love my self (which I sent her
yesterday), I still can't get in good graces. Maybe I'm panicking and
I'm being paranoid. I'm really sorry if I hurt you, Babe. I really don't
know what I did. I couldn't send this in a message 'cause then I would
feel even more lame if she didn't hit me back. I'm lost, yo. I really
don't know what's going on anymore. Not even with my own life. I miss
her. I miss you, dude. I'll leave you alone if you want. You can't blame
me if I panic. Its not even that we haven't talked, its that she hasn't
hit me back and that sucks 'cause I don't know what I could have
possibly done to get this kind of treatment.
Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Marty McFlying Out!!!
In Sidekick Mode!

Woke Up With This In My Head

Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Marty McFlying Out!!!
Delorean Style!

Woke Up With These In My Head

Usually don't listen to these songs but these go hard. The-Dream is a beast!
Peacin' Izzout!

I'm Mart McFlying Out!!!
Delorean Style!